Share device access with trusted partners to enable remote control and collaboration
The device sharing feature lets you collaborate with trusted partners, giving them the ability to control your devices or request access to theirs. Connections are secure, explicit, and revocable at any time.
0:00 Now I'm going to show you how to pair with a user on your account. On the left-hand side, I have an account I just registered, which is in the onboarding flow. On the right-hand side, I have the inbox for somebody who isn't on our dashboard yet, who you'd like to invite.
0:14 I'm going to complete the onboarding flow over here. I'm going to state that I'm over the age of 21, and I'm going to agree to receive marketing emails. Don't worry—you can change this later. I'm going to choose a fun username, in this case thematic_voyeur_63, and then I'm going to create an invitation.
0:34 At this stage, I can either enter the username of a partner who already has a dashboard account, or if they don't have one yet, I'll enter their full email address.
0:58 The next step is to determine what kind of access I want to give them. If I want to give them access to my devices, then I'm granting control of my devices. If they have devices and I want to control theirs, then I request access to their devices.
1:11 In our system, the person with the devices is typically the person operating them day-to-day. We avoid strict role labels because our community is broad, but for clarity in this flow, you can think of the person registering the devices as the device owner.
1:42 Let's go ahead and give this individual access to my devices. An invitation has been sent. On the right-hand side—perfect—I have an invitation to share devices. A user would like to share devices with me on the dashboard and asks that I create an account.
2:07 When this partner looks over here, they will see that a user has invited them to play. I'll register now on the right-hand side. We'll go ahead and do that. This new account will have to confirm its email address.
2:39 Then go through the onboarding flow, choose a username, and you'll see there's an invite waiting from the user on the left. There might not be a username shown yet if the inviter hasn't completed onboarding—that's all right. For now, I'll accept.
3:08 Perfect. I can now control and modify this user's devices. We're all done.
Terminology: You may see the terms Keyholder (the person with control) and Lockee (the person whose device is controlled) in some product areas, such as the Chastity Lockbox. Device sharing works the same regardless of the names you use for roles.
Prerequisites
- You have a dashboard account. If not, start with registering a new account
- You know your partner’s username or their email address
- Optional: Pair any devices you plan to share before inviting a partner
Sharing-related emails (invitations and connection updates) can be managed in your email preferences
Create a share request
Open Partner settings
Go to your Settings and open the Partners section.
You should see an Invitations panel and your current Partners list.
Create an invitation
Click Create invitation in the top-right.
Choose how to invite
Enter your partner’s exact username.
- Select Give access to my devices to let them control your devices.
- Select Request access to their devices to ask for control of theirs.
Enter your partner’s full email address. If they don’t have an account yet, they’ll be prompted to register before accepting.
- Choose whether to Give access or Request access.
Send and verify
Send the invitation.
- Your partner receives an email notification (if enabled)
- A matching entry appears under Pending invitations
For privacy and security, we won’t confirm whether a username or email exists. Double-check spelling so your invitation reaches the right person.
Respond to invitations
When someone invites you to share device access, you receive:
- An email notification (based on your email preferences)
- A pending invitation in Settings → Pending invitations
Review each request carefully. Choose Accept to establish the connection or Decline to refuse access.
Understand connection types
Each partner shows a clear relationship indicator in the Partners list:
- You’re sharing: you’ve given them control of your devices
- They’re sharing: they’ve given you control of their devices
- Mutual sharing: both partners can control each other’s devices
Set up a switch account
Configure mutual device sharing for partners who switch roles.
Manage your connections
- Open the menu next to a partner’s name to manage the relationship
- Select Remove partner to end sharing in either direction
- Pending invites can be rescinded from the Pending invitations list
After removal, the partner no longer appears in your Partners list and loses access to any shared devices.
Best practices
Only share device access with people you know and trust. You maintain full control of your sharing preferences and can remove access at any time.
- Align on expectations and boundaries before sharing
- Review your connected partners periodically
- Remove connections you no longer need
If you’re using the Chastity Lockbox, assigning a Keyholder disables your own lock controls while sharing is active. For FAQs and safety features like Emergency Unlock, see:
- Invitation not received: ask your partner to check spam, confirm their address/username, and verify email notifications are enabled in Email Preferences
- Can’t find a username: invitations don’t confirm whether an account exists—send by email if you’re unsure
- Partner can’t accept: they must complete registration and email verification first
- Sent to the wrong person: rescind the pending invitation and re-send
If you need to transfer or reclaim device ownership (for example, after lending a device), review our policy and next steps:
Creating a New Account
Set up your Research and Desire account to control your devices from anywhere in the world
How to Set Up a Switch Account
Learn how to configure mutual device control between partners, enabling both users to control each other's devices without a fixed dominant/submissive hierarchy.